Come Sail Away IC Inbox

[crushed_pearls]

Erin's voice mail message is in a weary voice: "Erin Peters. If you called in the middle of the night and I didn't answer, I'm dying. If I pick up and someone on your end isn't dying, they will be shortly. Text otherwise."

Comments

[crushed_pearls]

"..." Erin laughs lightly, and kisses Cass's cheek. "We are the most fucking competent. Well. Here I am in your arms, bringin' it up, so...be honest with me, yeah?"

[not_the_last]

"Of course." She says it without thinking, and then flushes a little. "I'll do my best."

[crushed_pearls]

Fingertips, to brush Cass's hair back. Erin's smile is a flickering thing, genuine but at war with the worry that's been wringing her heart. "...Have you just been playing to make me happy? Have I been...I dunno, insistent? Oblivious?"

[not_the_last]

"You haven't been oblivious," says Cassandra -- that's the easiest part to answer, promptly and firmly. "Or insistent, if by that you mean ... pressuring me to do anything I didn't want to. You've always been careful."

A pause, and her voice goes a little smaller. "Were you waiting for me to ask?"

[crushed_pearls]

The smallest nod, and -

"...It sounds silly when you say it like that but. It's. Not? I think?"

[not_the_last]

She shakes her head.

Still smaller than usual: "It doesn't sound silly."

[crushed_pearls]

"...Maybe I should take my own advice and just ask, then: what is that aspect of our relationship to you?"

The softest kiss against Cass's cheek. "There's no wrong answer."

[not_the_last]

"It's ..." She takes a long breath.

"I enjoy it," she starts, slowly. "It feels good, and it's something I know you enjoy and that feels good too. Being close to you and making you happy. If ... if we never played that way again, but we were still close in other ways, and you were still happy? I think ... I might miss it but I don't know."

[crushed_pearls]

"..." Erin laughs, a short and ironic laugh, and nuzzles Cass's shoulder. "Not to play devil's advocate or anything love, but you didn't seem to miss it enough to notice. Then again, you might have detected that my lusts run hot and deep, what with all the subtle clues."

[not_the_last]

She looks away again, biting her lip, a tinge of red sliding across her cheeks.

And doesn't answer for a moment.

[crushed_pearls]

"...Cass, no one on this world or any other is obligated to be as horny as I am. I'm in a weight class with Max, it's exhausting, both of us are gonna regret it when we get older and our spines fuck off to more peaceful lands."

[not_the_last]

Low: "I still ought to have realized. I thought it was only ... circumstances."

[crushed_pearls]

That gets a warm nuzzle, and a squeeze. "We're really bad at finding a good time to talk about this," Erin teases, as much as herself as at Cass. "...Why do you think you'd miss it? Walk through your thoughts."

[not_the_last]

"I ... don't know if there is a why." She tries to move to sit up, without breaking out of Erin's embrace; the topological difficulty this presents is a welcome distraction.

"It's ... I like it. I enjoy it. I think one would miss anything good, that way."

[crushed_pearls]

Erin is about to be real unhelpful in Cass's adventure here since she's hiding her hot blush against her lover's shoulder; 'I think one would miss anything good' hit her right in the heart, with a warmth that is still, despite her experiences here, all too foreign.

[not_the_last]

"And -- I am trying to think about this selfishly, for the moment, but -- it isn't just because you like it, but that's part of what I like about it? And I think I would ... I think I might miss being that for you. Even if ..."

She isn't expecting the little stabbing pain, like stepping on a piece of broken glass, that comes with forming the words in her mind before speaking them.

She makes herself say them anyway: "Even if you didn't. Miss it."

[crushed_pearls]

"I mean, I love the ego rush of pleasing the people close to me," Erin murmurs. "Knowing they're feeling good...hell, it even feels a bit powerful, at times."

Mostly with Crabb. Crabb's good at that.

"I have missed it, but I didn't wanna put pressure on. I...like it, when you take control like that."

[not_the_last]

She leans in a little, to rest her forehead against Erin's.

"Has it been worrying you? That I didn't ask?"

[crushed_pearls]

Erin bites her lip, looking...guilty.

But she does nod.

[not_the_last]

"I'm sorry."

And she tilts her head up and aside a little, to brush a kiss to Erin's temple.

[crushed_pearls]

A shuddering sigh; something tense just leaves Erin's body, and she melts, softly, into Cass. "It's okay," she murmurs. "It really is, that was some clownshoes shit on my part...but I...am at your command. If you want me to be."