Come Sail Away IC Inbox

[crushed_pearls]

Erin's voice mail message is in a weary voice: "Erin Peters. If you called in the middle of the night and I didn't answer, I'm dying. If I pick up and someone on your end isn't dying, they will be shortly. Text otherwise."

Comments

[decrypter]

"There's where I'm a little stuck. I don't know what counts as opportunities - all my knowledge comes from observing others, from reading, and none of it feels applicable."

A flop back on the bed again.

"I want to get this right, Erin."

[crushed_pearls]

"Don't we all, but people aren't puzzles to be solved. You'll make mistakes with the best of intentions, and so will Darcy. How you handle that after, that's on you, but..."

Erin hums, thoughtfully, and then: "Flip side question - do you like being pursued? Is that a role in this romance that's fun to you? Like. Not as a deep question of identity or anything here, just, are you havin' fun with it, does it make you feel good?"

[decrypter]

"...I do. I really do. It feels nice to be sought after like that. Like I'm worth all that effort to go to. That I managed to catch the eye of someone who wants to be my champion is even nicer."

[crushed_pearls]

"Then the question just becomes, how do you make yourself available to be pursued." Erin almost said 'chased' and then decided, no, let's not get this tangled up in other memories for Helena. That might be.

Very bad.

"...I really hate to say it but you're probably gonna have to like, tell Darcy things you usually keep private. Like your birthday or important days in your life. Though if you're after maximum enrichment in your enclosure, telling people both of you know and like so Darcy can shake it out of them can also be fun, but...how to put this...if this were a Freehold, right, people would expect those kinds of mind games out of me because I'm Spring - deliberately setting it up like that is sorta our brand. Darcy's not Lost, this isn't a Freehold, there's no unspoken expectations that can take the place of communicating for you."

[decrypter]

"I know that much, Erin. I wouldn't do the discourtesy of being a total mystery." Nor would she send someone who she knows wouldn't have the patience for all of that through so many loops. It would be cruel.

"...If I could convince her to learn braille, I could write many notes. Feed her sense of romance that way."

[crushed_pearls]

"'Convince' her you say. Helena. Little bird. My darling. My brave poet. If you have to do any persuading beyond merely broaching the topic I will grant you a boon."

[decrypter]

"Do you think she'll take to me personally inviting her to lessons? Tutoring her myself is more intimate, but runs the risk of both of us getting distracted easily..."

[crushed_pearls]

A low, fond chuckle. "Mood. But given that she fucking hates me I can't really teach her myself unless she gets cool with some things real fast."

Alas.

"...Security writes Braille."

[decrypter]

"It does."

There's a fond edge on her words at that. Security is the only other person aboard currently who'd be able to decrypt her journals, as well - she'd handed the key to her personally designed shorthand over in private, considering that should something ever happen, someone should be able to decode them, to know her thoughts if she couldn't share them.

"But would it consent to teaching is the question? Or do I simply place the idea in Darcy's head and see where this takes us?"

[crushed_pearls]

"...Put it in their head," Erin decides after a moment's thought. "Maybe a note alongside a gift or favor. Don't comment on it, kinda just leave it for her?"

(Helena could rickroll Darcy.)

We're not suggesting that.

(It would be the greatest rickroll in any reality.)

We're not suggesting that.

[decrypter]

"I could make that milk bread Shouji helped me with again, actually. Food I made with my own hands would mean more than any present...plus, it's not like I know their style well enough to give something to wear."

Not beyond what she already has.

[crushed_pearls]

"...How the fuck are you already the ideal girlfriend..."

Erin coughs; she heard it, she hadn't meant to say that out loud. "I mean. Good idea."

[decrypter]

"An ideal girlfriend wouldn't be fretting over potentially committing some cardinal sin towards the relationship. She'd just know what to do."

She says it lightly, though Erin will know the reality in it.

"But it's nice, Erin, even if I'm going to keep worrying. It's nice to spend time together and hold their hand and share meals and kiss them." A tiny pause. "The girl I was when I showed up here would have never believed any of that would be possible."

[crushed_pearls]

"The girl you were still had a cop in her head telling her lies about her worth and her body," Erin murmurs. "And it's been nice watching you drag that cop out of your head and shoot them until the gore is no longer recognizable as human."

Beat.

"...That metaphor went dark but I stand by it."

[decrypter]

"They're still breathing, I think."

She's not going to shame Erin for her dark metaphors.

"I just...try to ignore it."