"Mm. But." Erin makes no move to reach for the blanket whatsoever, but she does very slowly and with no sudden movements take out her boot knife and her whetstone and start working on sharpening it. The rhythm is almost meditative.
"My...I'm gonna say religion to avoid having a really, really long explanation that I do not want to have right now, we're big on growth. On being reborn as someone who can be happy being themself. It's not easy. If it were easy, everyone would do it. And the hardest part is that, to do it, to be happy with yourself...you have to accept that you're who you are. That there's not a secret new person you're waiting to be. The shit that made me what I am happened, and I can't make it unhappen, and that means my happy future has to come to terms with that. There's no exit where I wake up in the morning and I'm not Lost, or not Fairest. That's just not realistic."
Scrape. Slide. Erin keeps her head down; she may not have eyes to make eye contact with but she suspects SecUnit will appreciate not feeling looked at.
"Whatever my opinion on your circumstances, on the bits of your life that you've shown to me, on...anything, I can't make that unhappen either. Neither can you. You didn't ask for my help tending that field; even if you did, I'm not sure I can relate except insofar as some of the things that happened to you sound a lot like what happened to me. It's nice to want to help, but there's help and then there's invading your goddamn personal space. If I'm making any amount of sense."
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2022-09-19 05:20 am (UTC)"My...I'm gonna say religion to avoid having a really, really long explanation that I do not want to have right now, we're big on growth. On being reborn as someone who can be happy being themself. It's not easy. If it were easy, everyone would do it. And the hardest part is that, to do it, to be happy with yourself...you have to accept that you're who you are. That there's not a secret new person you're waiting to be. The shit that made me what I am happened, and I can't make it unhappen, and that means my happy future has to come to terms with that. There's no exit where I wake up in the morning and I'm not Lost, or not Fairest. That's just not realistic."
Scrape. Slide. Erin keeps her head down; she may not have eyes to make eye contact with but she suspects SecUnit will appreciate not feeling looked at.
"Whatever my opinion on your circumstances, on the bits of your life that you've shown to me, on...anything, I can't make that unhappen either. Neither can you. You didn't ask for my help tending that field; even if you did, I'm not sure I can relate except insofar as some of the things that happened to you sound a lot like what happened to me. It's nice to want to help, but there's help and then there's invading your goddamn personal space. If I'm making any amount of sense."