Come Sail Away IC Inbox

[crushed_pearls]

Erin's voice mail message is in a weary voice: "Erin Peters. If you called in the middle of the night and I didn't answer, I'm dying. If I pick up and someone on your end isn't dying, they will be shortly. Text otherwise."

Comments

[crushed_pearls]

"Hey! I know! I realize! I am horny as hell, I'm aware, and I don't intend to change that! But! -" Erin raises a finger. "There's many conceptions of love. A lot of humans are like, y'know, straight, romantic, and sexual, but those three things are like separate fucking setting sliders, is the thing. You can be romantic but not sexual; you can be sexual but not romantic, or, as many people do, be kinda sorta one of those things, or, hell, none of 'em. Love without a sexual element is often called Platonic love and don't ask me why it's called that because I will go on a tear about an old dead guy I hate whose one good idea was this one."

[serialskiller]

Plato would go on the same tear if he ever heard his name ascribed to that one.

Murderbot seems to get stuck for a moment. And it's hard to say what part it gets stuck on. At least, unless you know it. It's a solid 37 seconds before it speaks, and that's only one word.

"Love?"

[crushed_pearls]

Erin nods, a ghostly little smile flickering on her lips. "There's a lot of forms of it. Maybe as many as people who feel it. English just doesn't have a lot of good words for it, because this language is a nightmare founded by violent assholes. Four different words for 'disembowel', only one each for 'magic' or 'love'." But she's NOT BITTER. "I'm not trying to define your relationship to Helena or to anyone else, just...opening a door for thought."

[serialskiller]

More hold music playing. It. Doesn't know what to do with any of that.

"Love."

[crushed_pearls]

"...You doin' okay there buddy?"

[serialskiller]

"Yeah, fine," it lied like a liar.

[crushed_pearls]

"You're gonna have to get a lot better at lying to lie to me successfully, SecUnit, but I'll give you a minute." Erin turns her attention to the surviving breakfast on her plate; there will be no survivors.

[serialskiller]

...
...
...
LOADING

"Look, I knew I was capable of being loved because I never had any choice in the matter at all, people were just going to love me because...people. I just. I didn't think. I...mrrrgh."

[crushed_pearls]

"...Yeah, feeling known."

You're not the only person in this conversation who had this realization, SecUnit. And it hurt for Erin too.

[serialskiller]

"I don't know what to do with this."

Because clearly, now that it's realized this, there's supposed to be something to do? Right? Some expectation that it doesn't know how to meet.

[crushed_pearls]

"Haste is your enemy here, buddy. You don't have to do anything. Love's beautiful and powerful but it doesn't have to be acted on; it can be something you keep for yourself. Even if you do decide to act, like...it's not like we have a time limit here. Where's everyone gonna go, Disneyland? We fuckin' live here."

[serialskiller]

"What is Disneyland?"

Irrelevant.

"It's not just Helena that I love, if that's the right word for the feeling. Like, she's special, she's my favorite human, but she's not the only one."

[crushed_pearls]

"Technically a specific theme park, often used to refer to several related theme parks by the same brand because living language generally bends to convenience rather than accuracy."

Irrelevant her ass, after the deck thing Erin is Explaining.

But she's also listening. She pushes her empty plate aside and takes her coffee up; easy excuse not to be 'looking' at her friend. "You've got a big heart, buddy. I'm not surprised, but 'm listening."

[serialskiller]

"You already promised, back at the beginning of this conversation, not to make this weird."

It's important to remind her that before saying this.

"I think I love you too?"

[crushed_pearls]

Erin's not sure what to do with that but she is pretty sure her immediate intense blush and sense of surprise are already making this weird. Thankfully there's an easy out to get her composure back: "Y'know I think I'm still hungry I'm gonna go be an extinction event on that shrimp berightback -"

Up from the table! TO THE SHRIMP!

[serialskiller]

Murderbot is not at the table when she gets back.

Scene!

[crushed_pearls]

"...Yeah I made that weird."

She's still going to eat the shrimp, with a shy little smile the entire time.