crushed_pearls | Come Sail Away IC Inbox

"Nah, you're fine." Erin takes a deep breath and finds a spot on the wall to lean against, cradling her coffee close to herself. She still tends to hold drinks like she's trying to warm herself up.

Helena's clearly distressed in some way; the flavor of the Glamour is complex but doesn't point to anything good. So Erin continues, in a gentle voice. "Ask what you'd like to ask. If I can't give you answers, I can tell you who can at least. What's the shape of what you feel you're missing?"

"...I don't really know what happened here before Halloween. Which would be fine, it's only been fifty three days, except I didn't fully grasp what happened at that game performance, and then apparently something happened at the wedding, and it left that same strange tension in the air, and none of it made sense until I understood that I thought the wrong person was the Captain."

She exhales, voice steady despite her nerves.

"It's led me to the conclusion that I need to try and understand this place more swiftly than I have been. To make such a mistake again...it could wind up with trusting the wrong person, at the wrong time."

"...I only showed up in September myself, but there's someone I trust to give you a good overview. I'll ask her when we get back home. But..."

Say this straight or try to cushion it?

(Helena wouldn't forgive us for a cushion.)

Yeah. You're right.

"At the wedding, the Captain returned for the reception to dance with the author of the Black Binder, Skulduggery. The two of them shared a kiss, confirming suspicions that they're romantically involved, and, well. You can imagine the kind of tensions flaring up between those who feel the best plan is to kill or otherwise coerce the Captain versus those who think he's...more like me."

Edited 2022-12-27 20:17 (UTC)

"...What is the black binder, Erin?"

This, more than anything else, will probably tell Erin a good bit about why Helena feels lost.

"...Ah."

Deep breath. This is going to be bad later.

"The Black Binder is the collection of what we know, or think we know, about the ship and its master."

There's a moment where Helena is silent, restraining every response she wants to give on that. Everything that says that such a thing is very important, and she makes herself calm down.

"And right now said collection is in question due to the now-unknown motivations of its author, but prior, it was considered reliable information."

Okay. She can follow.

"Aye. I mentioned it when you first arrived but you uh. Proceeded to be. Homeless. At that time. Mighta gotten lost in the shuffle." Another deep breath. "I'm still sorry about that. I should have done more."

"...I didn't want you to know about that."

A tinge of pink rises in her face. So, somehow that had gotten out.

"You were all dealing with so much. To impose would be impossible."

"...Christ on the fucking Cross, Helena, impose next time. Okay? Impose. You're my roommate and my friend and I'm the big scary sword lady, keeping you safe is something I'm glad to do. You shouldn't have been alone like that."

Erin pinches the bridge of her nose and manages not to sigh. "...If I can't handle something I'll tell you, okay? On the name my mother gave me. Don't. Don't do the 'I'm fine' bullshit with me. I'm so exhausted of it."

"Okay. I promise."

More pink rises - she's embarrassed, thoroughly, to be caught out. But at least it won't be a secret she has to keep anymore, even though half of her mind wishes she had covered her tracks better.

"Maybe...when we get back, after Christmas, I should see Mr. Skulduggery."

"Thank you. And good plan. I might suggest you also ask SecUnit to read the Binder to you; it'll give you the text as it exists. It'll be...heavy information."

There's a small pause. Then: "I'm not gonna pry into your business, Helena. But if you ever need to talk, I'm ready to listen. I'm a bit hard to horrify, given the circumstances."

"Thank you. I appreciate that, greatly. Perhaps...when we're not on this trip."

Pause. Taking a breath, the words stick a little on the way out, and Erin will see some of that effort. The signs of someone who doesn't usually talk, fighting the urge to swallow more of her words.

"Whatever's in that binder, it won't be too heavy for me. I'll ask SecUnit later when
I see it if it wouldn't mind the recitation."

"Alright." Erin hesitates, then continues: "You're very considerate of others, Helena. But this is a marathon, not a sprint. Please be considerate of yourself too."

"...Would you like a hug?"

"...Yes, if you wouldn't mind."

But knowing Erin's considerations with space, she'll let her make the first move.

Erin sets her cup down on the floor and approaches so she can cradle Helena into a gentle hug. She has to bend a little, but that's okay.

This is her friend, under Erin's aegis.

Only when Erin touches her does she move to hug her back, and Erin will feel the amount of tension in her shoulders, constantly there in her posture. It doesn't exactly ease away, but she at least breathes, bringing herself back to center. It's okay. This was okay.

When she manages to speak again, it's half muffled in Erin's clothes.

"Sorry this wasn't merely me missing our usual discussions."

A gossip session is a lot more fun than this.

"You have nothing to apologize for, Helena," Erin murmurs softly. "But don't worry, I've got plenty stored up. I've been slacking on the news myself since I've been so busy making Christmas presents."

"Good. Once you're rested enough, you'll have to tell me everything that I've gone and missed by being elsewhere."

The second Erin wants to let go, Helena will - but truth be told, she's not going to be the one to do so first. Blame it on being a tactile person.

Yeah, Erin's not letting go any time soon either.

"Done deal, youngblood. Can't wait to tell ya how the maze went too."

"Yes. You'll have to tell me who won, who lost...I'll tell you about the horses, and the people I've gotten more acquainted with."

"...your coffee's going to go cold, though."

"It'll go cold regardless, it's for later." Erin gives Helena a soft squeeze and lets go, though, stepping back out of her personal space. "...Enjoy Christmas, Helena."

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